It's okay; I always look this shitty;

Ah the life of a cripple!

I don't feel a lot of need to be too PC when it comes to being disabled, even though I'm probably not the "typical" kind of disabled most might identify with.

My friend Seb was telling me about my old landlady filing for SSD, and she was a bit freaked that she caught people following and filming her. Seb asked if it bothered me knowing I might have been filmed when I've actually been known to work on my cars (among other things).

I laughed and told him that anyone filming me working on a car would not exactly work to their benefit. Just because you CAN do something doesn't mean a) that you can do it consistently, or b) that you even SHOULD be doing it at all.

In my own case, I pay for it when I do it. I'll be damned if I'd pay somebody else $1000 to do something I can do myself for $150. Granted, I may be sick for a week after doing it myself, but when you only make $1400 a month in the first place (yeah ...we "welfare slugs" live really high on the hawg) ...I'll deal with feeling like shit. Sometimes my bad spells happen even if I'm NOT doing shit that I have little doubt will screw me up; saving that much money is a worthy cause as far as I'm concerned.

So anyway ...after my month long battle with the assholes at Farmer's over my fender bender on Memorial Day; they finally paid off on my claim, I got the check on Tuesday, picked up my parts Thursday, and put them all in yesterday. Remarkably ...it only took about three hours; I pulled the fender off and used a rubber mallet to beat it into a passable facsimile of its original shape. I had to break out my real hammers for the inner frame areas, but I got everything "close enough" so the replacement headlamp and stuff fit in. Cheesy as it sounds, I used zip ties for parts of the bumper that were torn. I'm not saying it looks pretty, but it looks a hell of a lot better than it did ...and as of a couple hours ago, it's completely legal again.

I was sure a wreck myself after working on my wreck of a car though. I'm sure I was bobbing and weaving all over the place while I was doing the work; by the time I was done, I could barely stand or walk (good thing I had the car to drive, since I was too dizzy to walk and all). I was unable to do very much but rest after getting home, and when I woke up this morning ...I still felt like I'd been run over by a truck.

Which is par for the course when I do stuff like ...working on my car. (they do call it "disabled" for a reason)

So anyway ...as I'm sitting up this morning drinking coffee and doing my morning surfing, I get a knock on my door. I open it to be greeted by a smiling pair of Jehovah's Witnesses handing out pamphlets on preparations for the end of the world (thank you very much ...now go the fuck away). I look at the time after politely shoo-ing them away and figure it may be time for me to run through the shower and go see about getting the car inspected.

As I get out of the shower though, there is yet another knock at the door. I throw a towel around myself and go look out the peephole, and it is yet another smiling Jehovah's Witness holding a handful of the same pamphlet's I'd already received.

So I just decided to ignore him and let the dogs just yap him to death. I went back in ...put my clothes on, ran a comb through my hair, brushed my teeth etc ...and this guy just kept on knocking. ...and the dogs just kept on yapping. The knocking I can ignore, but I just don't do quite so well with the bro's two little noisemakers.

I took the pamphlet I'd already been given and opened the door all fresh and clean from just getting out of the shower ...and the guy immediately apologizes for "just waking me up."

see the header.

oh hell no, I didn't actually say that (although I thought about siccing the killer Yorkshires on him); I just thought about it later and it amused me enough that I thought it would be a funny header for a blog. I just held up the flier and told him that other people had already been by ...he apologized again and left.

Thanks a whole fuck of a lot dude. Like I really even needed another reason to despise you jerks!

Oh well, I have a lot more hours left in the day to look shitty, so I guess I'd better get to it.

poor babies

It was a busy day yesterday. Mom had originally brought up the idea of getting together for "movie night" at my place for a change (*major gasp*), but ended up tossing that idea due to the fact that she needed to stop by the sister's house and let her dogs out.

...seems to be a LOT of "dog taking care of" going around of late. Mom brought up the idea of going to Winsboro for the fourth weekend, and I'm actually considering it. We'll see what the next week brings I suppose. I'm heading to Seb's in a few, and it will be a nice break from the "little darlings." lol

I may have to do an AFF blog about Tera, and her not getting on the bed ...even after I nearly put her on it last night. Wayne informed me of what Angela does to reward the little shit for doing what she wants to do in the first place, but won't merely because she knows she can get a treat out of it.

prettttttyyyy amusing ...but Homey don't play that game. If she wants to sleep on the floor out of spite, and save me a few nights of her and Zeke getting in growling wars over who gets to sleep next to me ...then so be it.

mean 'ol Uncle GM ...sheesh!

business as usual

I don't think that I'll be posting anything on AFF today; I've got just a bit over an hour to get out of the house to Mom's so that we can meet my cousin for lunch. It's liable to be a busy next few days ...and I certainly need to get the parts for my car now that I finally have the check.

It'll be nice to get a sticker on the car again so I can quit worrying about it getting towed.

It'll be even nicer to get everything written out and start pounding some heads at Farmers. I think that I'm going to start with my greyone blog, and perhaps either send the link to some editorials, or just have two versions.

I've been pretty impressed with myself this month ...my writing sure seems to be coming back to me. I sometimes wonder how it can be that I manage to be such a dichotomy in wanting the attention, yet shunning it at the same time. I like to be as funny as possible in my blog, yet only about the parts of myself that I'm willing to let be seen.

My watch list has jumped by five people this week, and I must admit that I sort of enjoy watching that number rise ...I don't even remember what it was up to at its highest point, but I'm fairly certain I've got a ways to go. It's extremely flattering to suddenly be getting messages out of the blue again as well.

I've been trying to jot down memo's for subjects that may be amusing to write about; ironic that it seems like everything I write about is just so ...ordinary. It's nice to be appreciated for seeing the humor in stuff that most probably take very much for granted.

Time for the shower, and then getting the little bundles of joy ready to head to grandma's house.

happyhappy joyjoy

nightus interuptus

Well ...last night immediately after posting the previous blog, I had decided to retire the computer for the evening and chose a movie to watch.

I got exactly eight minutes into it when the phone rang and it was Dad's nursing home

for the second time this week. (the fifth time in the last three months)

Dad was having yet another fit, and they needed me to come over and see if I could get him calmed down. The night shift is certainly a lot less formal than the day shift ...they were a lot more prone to joking around with me about things, and Zeke-ums sure gets more of a hero's welcome with the staff as well as the patients.

On Thursday it was that he wouldn't take his medicine ...this time was that he was refusing to take a shower and I think that he had wet himself (although it wasn't visible when I got there at least ...but the geriatric "Huggies" will do that).

Given how he was on Tuesday ...and then again when Mom & I were there Wednesday, and then yesterday.

pardon my french ...but:

HOW IN THE FUCK DID HE GO THAT FAR DOWNHILL JUST SINCE SUNDAY?!?!

I was a lot more polite of course, but if having to call me 2-3 times a week to calm him down gets to be a habit, then I might start getting a bit less polite about things. ...but at least I started to get to the bottom of things. They took him off his anti-anxiety meds ...and wonder of wonders, now he's constantly wanting to go home, wanting to make all the phone calls

...in a nutshell; all the stuff that I advocated that he needed to be on the anti-anxiety meds for in the first place. The initial response from them the last time was to increase his anti-psychotic meds. And I asked "exactly which part about wanting to go home from a strange place is psychotic? ...it's his anxiety that needs to be managed."

But they say that the anti-anxiety meds make him too groggy.

...and I politely (no, really ...I was VERY tactful) told her that they needed to find some other anti-anxiety meds that made him a little bit less groggy.

Geez ...I may just be doomed to have to see Dad 3-4 times a week if this keeps up.

*sigh*

be vewy quiet

You don't need to do it now, but I need to do something about the dust bunnies around here ...and soon.

When the carpet starts feeling a bit "crunchy" I guess that can be a bit of a clue that I need to do a clean up; it just isn't going to happen tonight.

I can't seem to come up with anything good for AFF today, although I think I've been managing something fairly close to humor on facebook at least. Even the commenting on my friends blogs at AFF hasn't been bad. ...I don't think it's a case of writers block so much as just not doing anything to write about.

I may be stooping to something about my housecleaning habits or the kitchen again if this keeps up. Perhaps I could even tackle something to do with the fish.

oh geez ...and NOW I remember what it was that I was telling myself I needed to write about; it was driving me nuts this morning though.

*note added* ...I ain't starting tonight though. It's also looking as though I'm going to miss out on the Insurance lady from Farmers ...AGAIN!

I think I may be able to write a whole series on the upcoming dillema with my vehicles.

for now ...I think I'm just going to work on my vegetable impersonations for the evening though.

how in the world did THIS happen?!

This blog is supposed to be my refuge that nobody knew about for crissakes!

Somebody was asking me about my somewhat more popular blog. After the previous post on atheism, although I somehow doubt that particular person would be offended personally, I know a few others who might be.

I have this weird habit though ...I like googling my name (both my real name and my blog name) to see where I'm at in the world. It used to be that the number one hit on my username was my blog at AFF ...the close second was a ton of references to some linux application and perhaps a couple of things that were probably misspelled, although maybe not on purpose.

but NOW ...ARGH! ...This blog is ranked in front of my AFF one! ...in fact, now my user profile there is ranked in front of my blog now.

Damn those rich nymphomanic supermodels!!! How DARE they look at my profile before my blog!

I guess I'd better start trying to get popular again and try to push "under the hood" back up to the top of the google searches again. I can only juggle so many blogs at a time, and I'm just not sure I want this fucker to be more well known than the one I actually try to capitalize on.

What's the use of hiding in plain sight if everyone can see you?!

One other interesting thing about the google search was that I seem to have an awful lot of people apparently trying to nab up my user name on other blog hosting sites. At a guess, I would think it's likely a bottom-feeder hoping they might be able to cash in on the possibility I might want that spot at some date in the future.

Too bad you don't have to pay to keep those open; I'd say somebody doesn't know me very well.

bored

The novelty of facebook is finally wearing down a little bit; it's given me a good excuse to say hi to a couple of old classmates and even hook up with some other old friends from another place but it may not be long before I simply delete the profile.

It's sure one that isn't likely to last though; the whole "using my real name" thing just creeps me out a little bit. I don't care to hang around much of anyplace long enough to get too popular (blog for another day there ...hell, that could be a whole book), and I sure don't care for my name and personal info being attached.

So we'll see.

The few classmates I've said hi to won't last. As with the guy who was my best friend in High School ...after a conversation in which he told me that he thought that creationism should be taught in science class alongside evolution, I quickly figured out that we just really didn't have anything in common anymore.

Same thing with some of the others. I see some with some nice and gushy Christian sentiments, which I don't have a problem with as long as they keep it away from me. Crazy that if I were to post something promoting atheism, I'd more than likely really ruffle some feathers (or merely be taken off a friends list ...it's happened before, and I'VE even been the one to do it before when things got to be just a bit TOO obnoxious). There IS a double standard for sure. I remember a guy once telling me that he thought my father should disown me for not believing in the same god as he did, and yet was outraged when I suggested that all of his rhetoric about "family values" was reduced to only so much bullshit if he truly believed that.

granted I could have been a bit more polite about it, but it didn't make it any less true.