Motivate me

Wow.

So I'm coming up quick on the third month without a smoke and just a bit longer to make the second month living at Mom's.  All in all, it hasn't been bad here ...Mom and I get along well, we have a long way to go when it comes to getting into any sort of "groove" but at least it isn't being an uncomfortable transition.  Smoking cravings come and go, but I seldom even take them seriously anymore.

I need to get out and go to the bank today; I haven't been out of the house except for the frequent dog-walks since last Friday maybe?  I have plenty of things I could be doing but I'm 1) not feeling very motivated and 2) just plain not feeling all that WELL either.

In the writing interim, I managed to do a total overhaul on the house interior.  I cleaned everything ...and at a level of cleanliness that I didn't really even think I was capable of.  The family is wowed and so are Mom and I ...but as always, I'm afraid it came with the price tag that I'm finding now:  I was writing checks my body couldn't cash.  I just don't have much left.

Mom and I go in fits and starts ...I'll cook for 3 or 4 days, then she'll do a day or three.  I was so hyped up with the move and the cleaning I had a really hard time slowing down ...and this is part of the reason I didn't want to slow down.  I knew the crash would come.  I'm glad I made it through the worst of it, but now it's time to start figuring out what to do with "from now on" and I really don't have a clue.  I'm pretty sure the aching body will either motivate me or make me depressed.

so many changes.

sigh